Traveling and especially taking a plane always involves overpriced food, a lot of waiting and a paranoia that's usually about different ways of not surviving the flight. Every little detail like stressed flight attendants, a 15-minute delay and even a crying baby kick-starts the process my brain just loves to produce whenever I'm about to get my body unnaturally high up in the air. However, there is one feeling that is way worse and stays with me for even longer than my traditional Final Destination (2000) experience. It's a condition that has nothing to do with the traveling itself, but more with the ending of it: Post Travel Blues.
I'm standing in the doorway, just about to take a step inside what should feel familiar, but rather seems like a new experience to me, or something I've dreamt before. The walls look different, decorated with unfamiliar faces, and I can actually sense the house's smell again. I'm walking inside and before the horrible realization of having to unpack hits me, I pause. It's not just a strange kind of déjavù. Neither am I just 'going back' to the place where I made some amazing memories later. I am back. Back to the ordinary, the usual, the different-from-the-fun-world-outside-a-structured-and-monotone-life.
My type of post travel blues always invites his cousin Nostalgia, both letting me believe that I will never have such a great time again now that I'm back. The polaroids and pictures on my phone that I've brought with me don't necessarily help me with moving on, either. Whenever I've had a great holiday, it's hard to believe that I'll ever be fortunate enough to create the same, even better memories. Not just because I left the people I've made these memories with, or the places where they were made. One of the main reasons why I believe I'll never have such a great time again, is because it always seems like I'm leaving a big part of myself behind. Another version, another personality, a now missing and crucial piece of me.
However, as soon as I stop being so self-conscious and slowly get closer to nihilism, I remind myself of the memories I've made here. It is so easy to bath yourself in self pity after having to end a great journey, which makes it hard to think of what's ahead of you. It's the new year, people have been talking about new opportunities and challenges to take on since 2016, and Tumblr is surely full of quotes about 'blank pages' and '365 new chances'.
If you have come back home from a great holiday yourself and you are struggling to feel like you're in the right place, just remember all the experiences you hadn't thought you would gain before you came where you are now. Life always introduces new people and memories to you when you don't expect it, so don't give up on the very likely possibility that there are more laughs to be laughed and pictures to be taken, that will both be presented on your bedroom walls. Hopefully your travel post blues will fade away in a few days, just as soon as you realize that you can feel belonging, excitement and familiarity no matter where you are.
I'll try to cure mine with procrastinating instead of doing lots of school work now, talk to you all soon. x
